Have you ever read up on the history of limes? You probably haven’t, which is ok, neither had we.
We always just assumed limes were always some kind of vaguely ubiquitous tropical fixture around the world. Which they are now, but turns out they originated in the area around northern India, Myanmar, and Malaysia.
They were brought to the Middle East by Arab traders, and then brought to Europe by Crusaders.
That’s right, limebubly was effectively brought to you by a Holy War, and we guess we can lump it in with all the other atrocities committed during the crusades.
Look, we’re sorry, bubly. We actually really love your Blackberry, and your Mango hangs in there with the best. But first the Cherry, and now this? What is going on over at Pepsico?
We have to guess that there is some kind of schismatic battle happening, with one branch of devout fruitarians adhering to the sanctity of flavor, and another, heathen sect bent on destroying all that is good in the bubbleverse.
The nose on this one is actually promising, a juicy lime evoking those flat green lollipops in the square plastic cellophane. (Are those still around?)
The lollipops are certainly not anywhere to be found in this can. The pop tab says “oh hi” when what it really means to say is “oh, I forgot to put any flavor at all in here.”
Or rather, there is a flavor, and it’s tap water. Slightly chlorinated, maybe containing some “lime” (as in the mineral, not the fruit.) But nothing citrus, nothing green, nothing else.
Ok, maybe there’s the slightest, slightest hint of something lime-like sloshing around in there, like some citric acid leaked into the municipal water supply and a few molecules made it into the can. But even this only serves to create a bitter aftertaste. Repeated sips have us alternating between confusion and disgust.
Even the carbonation is weak. Maybe we got a bad can or something, but we’re not going to try again with another round.
The can genially announces “I feel like I can be open around you”. Oh, bubly. Maybe you should stay closed on this one.
The chipper, cheery branding that encapsulates all of bubly’s sparkling water is a friendly hello, but with this flavor we just want to wave goodbye. 👋🏻
If you’re a lime person, what you really want is Waterloo’s Lime, or better yet, their Lemon-Lime.
Go now and don’t look back. This is atrocious. Really.
Carbonated Water, Natural Flavor
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